Sunday, November 20, 2011

oldest child syndrome

I had no idea that there were so many other people that had a similar experience as me being the oldest child. Because my parents were both working I had to be a parent a lot of the time. I babysat my four younger siblings for hours after school, helped with housework daily, and even financially gave to my family. I didn't really mind then but I can look back and see that this caused trouble with my relationships with people in my family.
 I was in an awkward limbo between being a parent and a child. My siblings needed my help for a lot of things in the absence of my parents but rejected the idea of me "bossing" them around or being to involved in their life. My parent also relied on me for a lot of things, but then they would randomly "put me in my place" that I wasn't the parent. This role that I took greatly effected my future relationships. People think of me all the time as being the "mother". I like to take care of people, but I don't like being such a mom in my relationships, especially with dating. I'm not sure how to get out of this pattern. Any ideas?

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